Christmas Descent

December 11, 2022 A tale for the season

---

Christmas Descent

Outside

Have you ever heard of the story, of Henry’s strangest Christmas Eve?

It began on the road between two cities. Henry was famously running late, made worse by a blizzard that masked the usual landscape. All he could see was the dozen feet of headlight. The rest was darkness.

Henry looked at the time. Miles away a family was now sitting down for dessert. A lonely chair awaited Henry’s bum.

Instead Henry’s bum was in the seat of his car.

Henry rubbed his eyes. Wait, don’t rub. What’s that over there. Lights! Civilization.

As Henry drove closer he realized that the lights were a lonely diner next to this never ending road. It seemed like a good option to stop here. Lest Henry would end up stopping in a snow bank.

As Henry exited his vehicle the snow began swallowing the tires of his car. No leaving here anytime soon.

Henry entered the diner.

Inside

It was incredibly busy. Every table was in use and filled to the brim. Henry stood at the entrance for a few minutes until a waiter finally greeted him. The waiter told Henry to try to find any seat possible and disappeared among the crowd, all while holding six plates of food.

Henry scanned the room. Over there in the shadowy corner was an empty chair. Maybe the only empty seat in the whole diner!

Henry sat down. It was a tiny table with a person already sitting opposite to him. The person wore a giant black hat and held a red book in front of their face. They lowered their book to reveal themself to be a beautiful woman.

“Hello,” she said.

The two of them talked.

Woman

It felt like an engaging conversation, but Henry soon lost focus on the conversation and became distracted by the woman’s beauty. Her face was perfectly constructed, like a marble statue. And her red lips. The way they moved as each word slipped from her mouth.

Henry was so was so mesmerized, that without thinking, he asked if he could kiss her.

“Oh no,” she casually replied.

Henry felt heartbroken.

“Okay how about this. If you complete three challenges I will give you a kiss,” she said.

“What challenges?” asked Henry.

“I was supposed to call someone saying I won’t be able to make it to Christmas Eve dinner. Could you do that for me? The payphone is just over there.”

“Why me?”

“Well I don’t want to lose my seat.”

“And what are the other two challenges?”

“One at a time,” she said.

“Sounds easy enough. What’s the phone number.”

The lady scribbled in her notebook and tore the page out for Henry.

Henry took the note and got up from his seat. Immediately he almost bumped into the waiter, who was carrying another six dishes.

“Oh that was close,” said the waiter.

The pay phone was on the other side of the diner. Henry walked between busy tables of families and strangers.

Phone

Henry slipped some quarters into the machine, picked up the phone, and began to dial his family. But suddenly, before he finished, the phone started to speak.

“Hello!!” said the phone.

“What?!” said Henry.

“What?” replied the phone.

…

“I’m hanging up,” said Henry.

“No I’m hanging up,” replied the phone. And then the line went dead.

Henry entered in a new set of coins and finally dialed his family.

Henry’s wife answered. The call was quick. An explanation of absence and assurance of safety. They were all having too good of a time over there to keep the chat going. Henry hung up and collected his change. Just enough coins for one more call. Henry held out the note with the phone number and began to dial. He held the receiver up to his ear.

Ring, ring ring…

We interrupt your reading to remind you about Chaninkski’s Energy Balls.

Chaninkski’s Energy Balls are the perfect snack or meal to consume while reading. The act of reading exercises the brain and requires energy and nutrients. Chaninkski’s Energy Balls were designed to completely satisfy your body’s craving, both physically and mentally.

Purchase one box for only $9.81, or for limited time, buy 2 get 1 half off! That’s limited time. Don’t wait. Order now.

We’ll now return you to your local reading.

Upon his return to the table, Henry noticed someone was sitting in his seat.

A man in a coat and hat was sitting in deep conversation with the lady.

“Hello?” greeted Henry with a little annoyance.

The stranger looked up in curiosity, “Hello.”

“You’re in my seat.”

“It was empty when I arrived.”

Henry looked at the woman. She shrugged and said, “I told you that’s why I didn’t want to go to the payphone myself.”

“I thought you would save my seat,” replied Henry.

She shrugged again.

Henry returned his attention to the stranger. “Can I have the seat back?” asked Henry.

“But I just ordered food,” replied the man.

Henry was stunned.

The woman interrupted his disbelief, “Did you make the phone call?”

“What? Oh yeah, I did.”

“Oh splendid. Do you want to hear the next challenge?”

“Sure, why not.”

Challenge #2

“I left a present in my car outside. Would you kindly bring it here?”

Henry looked out the window. It was snowing even harder than before. “Out there in the blizzard?”

“Here’s the key, it’s a red Subaru.”

Henry had no where else to go, and nothing else to do.

“Excuse me,” said a voice behind him. Henry turned. It was the waiter holding a plate of hotdogs.

“Yes?” Henry said.

“Excuse me, I need to get by you.”

The waiter squeezed by Henry and placed the hotdogs in front of the stranger who had stolen Henry’s seat.

“Mmm, smells delicious,” said the the seat stealer as he prepared himself for the meal.

Henry made his way towards the exit, keys in hand.

It was like opening an old sealed door to a nuclear bunker. Or at least, that’s how Henry imagined it. Immediately wind and snow started to rush inside. Nearby tables gave Henry dirty looks so he quickly exited the building, closing the door behind.

Outside

Yep, it was indeed a blizzard outside. Henry could barely see two steps in front of himself. Henry inspected the keys to see if he could ‘beep’ the car to find it. But the keys were just keys, no remote or anything like that.

So Henry started to slowly and blindly go from one car to the next. He reached his hands out to touch the next car, wipe a patch of snow off, and closely press his face to see the colour.

The first car was black, the second car was also black, and the third one was a truck so Henry didn’t even bother.

Henry felt something brush against his leg. Not something cold, something warm.

Henry jumped up and looked.

A small white wolf. Or maybe it was a dog. No it had to be a wolf. It seemed like it wanted him to follow.

Do you feel lost in today’s world? Sick of being just a number in line, filled with uncertainty except for taxes and inevitable death? Fear not, you’re not alone. There is purpose!

Welcome to The New Connection. We are a small community of people that have disconnected from the “modern” obligations that are pushed onto us by society. We unsubscribe from the system and have begun our true lives. Paving the roads towards our own future.

Look away from the screen, and find the window of escape.

Unsubscribe today and wake up anew. Find The New Connection.

Inside

Henry burst through the diner’s door, gasping for warmth. No one seemed to notice his presence. The diner was just too busy for that. Henry was anonymous among the busy-ness.

Present in hand, Henry made his way back towards the infamous table.

The lady was there, book in hand again, and the hotdog-eater-seat-stealer was gone without a trace.

“Here’s the present,” Henry said, still catching his breath.

“Ah, that was faster than I thought,” she said with excitement.

“I found some help.”

“Ready for the final challenge?” she asked.

“I need a minute,” Henry said as he slumped into the old chair.

The woman resumed her book.

“So what’s in the present,” asked Henry.

“It’s not time yet,” she replied.

Henry continued his investigation, “What happened to the hot dog man.”

“He finished his hot dogs.”

“Makes sense,” Henry quietly replied.

Final Challenge

Henry didn’t think of much as he caught his breath. Finally, he announced his readiness, “Ok, I’m ready for the final challenge.”

“Ok,” said the lady. “The final challenge! When I first arrived here, I ordered the Lamb, however, it simply hasn’t arrived. Go out and get it.”

“What? You want me to hassle the waiter?” Henry was a bit disappointed by the lackluster quest.

The woman replied coldly, “Whatever it takes.”

Henry’s patience was thinning, “You can’t just wait eh?”

“Oh, you’ll need this.” The woman opened the present box, revealing a large black flashlight.”

Henry took the flashlight, too tired for more obvious questions.

Henry started walking around the diner. He managed to bump into the waiter.

“Hey watch it, again.” said the waiter as they held several dirty plates.

“You have any idea when that lady over there will get her lamb?”

The waiter replied in an automatic tone, “Sorry for long delays, we’re really busy tonight.”

Henry grabbed the waiter by the arm. “Listen, help me out here. It’s been a long night.”

“You’re telling me its been a long night. You listen, I just greet everyone, collect orders, serve the orders, collect the dirty dishes, and constantly refill coffees. As for when the lamb comes, it comes when it comes.”

The waiter brushed out of Henry’s grasp and disappeared into busyness.

Well there was only one last place to check.

Henry entered the kitchen. It was the complete opposite to the blizzard outside. Hot and steamy. Explosive fires shot out from frying pans. Henry spotted the chef. They were the only one there in the kitchen. One chef for everything. The chef’s arms moved so quickly from one task to the next, it almost seemed like he had six arms, or maybe there were three of him sharing one soul. But no, nothing supernatural was happening. It was simply one chef working very fast.

“Hello,” Henry said.

The chef didn’t stop cooking, “Welcome to my kitchen. What would you like?”

“I was wondering about a -“

“Wait!” interrupted the chef, “Try this before you decide.”

The chef held out a cooked green bean. Henry awkwardly accepted the single green bean and ate it. It tasted delicious. Henry nodded his head while he chewed, and realized he hadn’t eaten anything since breakfast.

“Well if you like that, you have to try this.” the chef held out a whole baked potato on a stick.

Henry took the stick and took a bite. Sure enough, it was delicious. Henry quickly devoured the whole potato.

“Good isn’t it?”

“Yeah, thank you.”

“Do you want more? How about a slice of bacon?”

This continued on for several dishes. Little tastes of food, served one after the other. How could Henry refuse?

“Is there anything else you would like?” asked the Chef.

Henry remembered, “A lady, she asked for the Lamb a while ago.”

“Ah lamb. I haven’t cooked Lamb in years.”

“Then why is it on the menu?”

“Is it? Must have kept it on there by accident. Y’know what, why not. There should be a lamb in the freezer over there. Could you grab it for me?”

Henry walked towards the freezer door. It took a lot of effort to open the old frozen door. Finally, with enough elbow grease, the door whined open. It was dark inside. Henry took out his gifted flashlight and shown it in. It was a strange freezer. Steps lead downwards.

“Don’t let all that cold air out,” yelled the chef from afar.

Henry entered the freezer.

He took the steps downward. His light didn’t shine far, he could only see the next three steps in front of himself. And the steps just kept continuing. Further downward into the freezer.

This is strange, Henry thought to himself. What kind of freezer is this?

Henry shown the flashlight to the side. The walls of the stairway were shelves of frozen food.

“Help,” said the shelf.

Henry shone the flashlight toward the voice. There stood a half frozen frog. It stayed still, then moved it’s mouth and quietly repeated, “Help.”

“What?” Henry said in half alarm.

“It’s so cold,” said the frog.

“I’m looking for a lamb,” Henry said.

“I saw a lamb once.”

“Where?”

“I’ll tell you, if you get me out of here.”

“Okay.”

“Down at the bottom of the stairway, the very bottom, you’ll find a lamb.”

“Thanks,” Henry said, then went to pick up the frog.

“No. Don’t take me down there. Pick me up when you make your return journey.”

“Okay,” Henry said.

Henry continued down the cold dark stairway.

Step after step. Henry was thankful for the flashlight, otherwise it could be a dangerous descent into the darkness.

Eventually, the steps ended. Flat ground!

A few steps forward, and there it was. The Lamb.

“Hello Henry,” said the lamb.

“Is this a dream?” Henry asked.

“Sometimes I wonder that too,” replied the lamb.

“I’m looking for some frozen lamb.”

“There’s a knife there,” the lamb pointed to a knife on the shelf.

A large knife. A butcher’s knife.

Henry grabbed it. It was heavy.

“Cut here,” said the lamb as it pointed to it’s own rib. “Try to cut cleanly.”

Henry raised the knife. He struck the lamb’s skin. The lamb’s face revealed pain, but it did not make any noise. Blood splattered into the darkness.

Henry raised the knife again to continue cutting the section of meat off. Hack after hack until a solid chunk of lamb was produced.

Henry held the piece of raw meat in his hand. The lamb breathed heavily, but did not complain.

“Thank you,” said Henry.

“That will be $29.42,” said the lamb.

“I left my wallet with my coat upstairs. I have no money.”

“That’s what they always say,” the lamb sadly remarked.

With nothing else to add, Henry turned around and made his way back up the stairs.

He didn’t see the frog on his return journey. Shame.

There was the freezer door, thankfully still left ajar.

Henry pushed past it back into the warmth of the kitchen.

But it wasn’t quite hot as it used to be. Definitely warmer than the freezer, but not how Henry remembered it earlier.

Also the kitchen was now dark. Everything was turned off and clean. Abandoned. And the chef was nowhere to be seen. Henry was alone in the kitchen.

Still carrying the raw piece of meat in his hand, Henry left the kitchen and re-entered the main room.

Henry relaxed, the dining area still had people. Still completely filled with every seat taken. Except now it wasn’t loud and noisy with laughter and eating. Instead it was dead silent. Everyone was asleep at their tables, napping off the high calory intake.

Henry made his way to the woman’s table. She was there, awake, reading her red book.

“Ah you return,” she said.

“Here’s your lamb,” Henry said, dropping the raw hunk of meat onto the table.

“Just what I ordered,” she said contently.

“I guess I completed your three challenges.”

“Do you want your reward Henry?”

“Sure, why else did I do all this.”

“Come get your kiss then.”

Henry leaned in, closed his eyes, and gave the woman a kiss. It was weird. Her lips felt rubbery.

Henry opened his eyes to discover the woman was gone, and instead sat a frog in the chair.

“Is this the end?” asked Henry.

“Yes,” replied the frog.